Saturday, May 16, 2009

of john tuverly and timothy golding and men who dwell by railway tracks

when i was seven years old, i used to love to watch my mother cook on the hot plate. i think is because i liked the way that she always had it up on full go, which caused the rings to glow the most amazing warm orange colour. i can remember sitting on the hard flat floor, my skin sticking to the lineo and stareing up in aww at it, wishing i could just hold it in my hands for a evening my curiosity got the better of me, while my mother stood there, waiting for the water to boil so she could cook the frozen peas, i decided i was going to touch it. i had mulled over the idea for some time but had never been able to pluck up the corage to do it. i always knew in the back of my mind it would be painful. but how could i not. so as my mother stood there watching me, with an amost excited grin on her face, i reached out. i was never a short child so i didnt have to strain to reach it, but in my mind it was as if it was the most unachieveable feet, like climbing to the top of a mountain. and then, i screamed. my fingers throbed and ached and stung all at once. my mother waiting, had already began running the cold water in the sink, and stuffed my hand under it. she was laughing rather lightly in my ear, as i screamed and cryed and winged. i asked her later why she had let me do it. why she had just stood there when she knew how much it would hurt. she told me that unless i had done it and felt the pain of it, i would have never learned to do it again. she said something never judgeing a book by its cover, even though the glowing red looked warm and pretty it was really painful and distructive. i took this advice to far, everytime i got that glowing awww feeling, i ran away and his my hands in my pockets, in fear of getting burned again.i realise now that people are not like hotplates. you cant avoid being burned by them all your life, the best you can do is hope with all that you have that they stove is up high enough to really hurt you. but even if it is all you can do is run your fingers under the cold water, and try again.


  1. AnonymousMay 20, 2009

    I love the pictures you always have to go along with the stories and I like your stories as well :)!

  2. fuck me, you are a fantastic writer.

  3. Hello Pan, pod says hello, wishes u a happy birthday